Decided to have a 4th of July party at my home. In my event invite I told everybody to bring their food and beverages for obvious reasons. I was hoping to at least not to be alone during the wonderful fireworks, that is clearly visible from my patio that overlooks the beautiful bay. As soon as I sent the invite I felt this happy anticipation, that I haven’t felt in a while. After what my family have been through, I needed to see some familiar faces.

The week before the party, I did everything to look my best for my friends – nails polished, new outfit, hair did. I just wanted to look healthy as much as I could. Of course I wanted to look pretty as well :-).

Around 60 friends showed up. What a turn out! They brought all kinds of food, drinks, deserts. It was amazing. They came setup everything. Some of them grilled burgers, hotdogs and chicken. Some of them took the little ones to the beach. The teenagers tossed football and ran around at the beach, played games, consumed all the food :D. I was sat in my chair and fed my favorite Turkish dishes and pampered all day/evening.

7 hours into the party, everybody gathered at the patio to watch the fireworks. We could see the crowd at the beach right in front of us. Then started the beautiful fireworks, not only from one side but two. We could see the Norfolk fireworks, besides the Virginia Beach fireworks. We all cheered together. It was wonderful. After the fireworks we gathered in my living room to take a group photo, which was fun.

It was around 11 and my friends proceed to clean the house. It wasn’t just picking up the trash. They washed all the dishes, vacuumed everywhere, wiped down all the surfaces, put everything back to where it was. It was amazing to watch them work in harmony. They left my home cleaner than it was before.

I had a wonderful 4th of July. There aren’t enough words to explain the gratefulness, appreciation I feel for what they collectively have done. It wasn’t throwing a good party. It was that they are there for me and I am not alone. I’ve learned, that it is me isolating them due to my pride.

Today I am in a lot of pain. I have really bad arthritis, migraine, muscle pain, pressure on my eyes, and so many other things, however I am HAPPY. Thanks to all my friends, I feel more alive today. Hurt, but alive 🙂

Zafer bayramini evimde bir partiyle kutlamaya karar verdim. Davetiyemde herkeze yaninda yemek getirmelerini soyledim hasta oldugum icin. Denize dogru bakan balkonumdan guzelim havai sifeklerini cocuklarla tek basima izlemek istemedim. Davetiyeyi yollar yollamaz birden bire icimde bir mutluluk dogdu. Bir suredir boyle hissetmemistim. Ailecek basimizdan gecenlerden sonra, tanidik yuzler gormeye ihtiyacim vardi.

Partiden bir hafta once guzellesmek icin hazirliklara basladim. Arkadaslarim icin guzel ve saglikli gozukmek istedim. Tirnaklarimi boyatip, bir iki yeni kiyafet aldim; tabi insan ne kadar normal olabilrse bu haliyle o kadar ugrastim.

Hic beklemedigim kadar kisi geldi partiye. Inanbilir misiniz 60 kisi? Herseyi onlar getirdiler, yemekten tut, iciceklere ve tatlilara kadar. Herseyi arkadaslarim ayarladilar. Kimisi mangalda burger, hotdog ve tavuk pisirdi. Kimisi ufakliklari sahile indirdi oyun oynatmaya.Teenagerlar amerikan futbolu oynayip, sahilde kosusturdular, video oyunlari oynayip ve tum yiyecekleri yiyip bitirdiler :). Ben, ben ise koltuguma oturtulup simartildim. Bu arada en sevidigim Turk yemekleriyle beslendim tum gun ve aksam boyunca.

Partinin 7inci saatinde herkez havai fiseklerini izlemek icin balkona cikitilar. Sahile dolusmus insanlari gorebiliyorduk bulundugumuz yerden. Birden bire havai fisekleri patlamaya basladi, hemde iki taraftan birden. Hem Norfoltaki hemde Virginia Beachdeki havai fiseklerini izlemis olduk. Hep beraber alkislayip, hep beraber tezahurat ettik her patlamada. Havafisekleri bittikden sonra oturma odasinda toplanip grup resmi cektik. Epeyde eglendik resimleri cekerken. Eee kolay degil suruyle kisiyi bir araya sokupta resim cekmek.

Saat 11 gibi el ayak cekilmeye baslayinca geriye kalan arkadaslarim evimi toparlamaya basladi. Sadece geriye kalan copleri toplamadilar. Bilasiklari yikadilar, halilari supurduler, tum mobilyalari silip, herseyi geri yerine koydular. Aralarindaki ahenki izlemek cok etkileyiciydi. Evimi piril piril biraktilar.

Cok guzel bir zafer bayrami gecirdim. Arkadaslarimin beraberce yaptigi bu iyilik icin bu mutesekkurlugumu, bu minnettarligim kelimelerle acikliyabilecegimi zannetmiyorum. Boyle hissetmemin sebebi guzel bir parti vermemden dolayi degildi. Duygularimin asil sebebi arkadaslarimin benim icin orda olmasi ve benim yalniz olmadigimi anlamamdi. Onlarin beni yalniz birakmadigini, tam tersine benim etrafimdaki insanlari gururum yuzunden uzak tututugumu farkettim.

Bugun cok aci cekiyorum. ROmatizmalarim azmis durumda, tum kaslarim agriyor, gozlerimde buyuk bir agirlik var, ve bir cok daha sorunlarim var ama birsey kesinki MUTLUYUM 🙂 Arkadaslarim sayesinde yeniden hayatta hissediyorum kendimi. Canim yaniyor ama hayatta hissediyorum kendimi.

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2 Thoughts on “4th of July – Knowing I’m not aloneZafer Bayrami – Yalniz olmadigimi bilmek

  1. Rosemary Brock on 07/05/2013 at 2:22 PM said:

    God says,fear not for I am always with you. <3

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